It’s interesting that I look at everyone else in my life and think, without a doubt, that they’re going to make it. They’re going to do what they want to do in life, get where they want to go. Why? Because of all of the qualities I see in them, and have been seeing in them since I’ve met them. However, I fail to see the same thing in myself.
Sometimes I can’t see a future for myself, and that’s scary.
Someone please make me snap out of this.
A couple days ago, I ranted about how people don’t understand how much making art/creating something for someone else means, and how it should never, ever be taken for granted.
My ex (who I’m friends with) was just messaging me, and commented on my latest piece. He said “I might just have to ask you for one more thing, I think a poster of something you do would be amazing”. My first thought of course, (because it always is) was: yeah! I can always use a new project!
Then it hit me.
I’m agreeing to this because I’m still in love with him. He was asking for nothing in return and I know that he will never show as much gratitude as I would like. I would be inadvertently giving a piece of myself to him, and quite frankly, as that JUST happened over reading week…I’m running out of pieces.
I can’t have my heart broken through art
It’s all I have left